A Mother's Secret

As a mother things can be so hard.  Your kids can try your patience like no one can.  What people don't ever talk about is the mother's who have it double hard.  The mom's who also have an illness or who also suffer from a mental illness.  It's faux pas now.  We have to have these perfect lives for social media. The perfectly clean house and craft these amazing lunches for our children.

I'm lucky I can get out of bed.  I have Bi-polar disorder, depression and anxiety.  I've had all of these disorders since I was 15.  They have put me on all kinds of medication.  I went through a lot of hard times.  I finally found a time where I didn't needs any medication.  And now that I have hit a rough patch, its times for me to explore the the medication again.  Mom's have it rough, don't get me wrong dad's do too. However, the father's aren't the ones that have the babies they don't suffer the postpartum, or have the carry the child for 9 months.  Don't get me wrong there are men out there who have the empathy for the women and there are plenty who don't and think they can handle being a woman.

I suffer from bipolar disorder, it was not that prominent till my mom was diagnosed with cancer, the pressure of taking care of my mom, my 3 girls as well as going to school full time, being a wife and taking care of the household.

The highs and the lows are rough and who suffers the most the people you love.  My husband started seeing the changes the most.  I was able to handle and control my emotions in the beginning. Now have have lost the handle on it.  I go to therapy once a week.  Now I'm looking at taking medication again.  To find balance with children and have a mental illness is the hardest thing.  As a mother you don't announce to the world that you have bipolar disorder.  It's your biggest secret from the world and your kids.  How many other mother's stay quiet too?